The Devil’s Snare

Towards the end of the book Harry Potter and the Sorcerer’s Stone, Harry, Ron and Hermione encounter a plant called the Devil’s Snare. Feeling the tendrils dangerously wrap around them, the nervous kids do what is natural: they attempt to fight against it. To their dismay, the more they struggle, the tighter the plant grasps them. It is Hermione who discovers that if they stop fighting, the plant reacts in kind, and they are able to make it past the challenge, fresh and ready to continue the larger fight. In order to get through this challenge, the book tells us, they had to experience a moment of acceptance of the situation they were in.

I’ve become better at recognizing Devil’s Snares in my own life: Power struggles with my children; traffic when I am worried about getting somewhere on time; acquiescing to rules that seem arbitrary.

In our hectic modern lives, we all encounter moments which trigger the desire to struggle. And sometimes, that is the right response. But other times, we may find, like the famous trio, that fighting may not help the situation; rather, we sometimes find that the more we engage in the struggle, the tighter it seems to grip us. Getting past this moment feels impossible.

What would practicing acceptance look like in these moments?

What if, instead of instead of arguing with my daughter about whether or not she needs a jacket on a winter morning, I accepted her wishes and focused on other aspects of our relationship? What if rather than changing lanes, checking google maps to see if there is an alternate faster route, I took a breath and realized that the traffic on the road was out of my control and that I would arrive safely as soon as I could. What if I was able to take a breath and accept some arbitrary rules and rather, turn my attention to thinking about why it was important to me.

Because acceptance does not necessarily mean giving up. Hermione had no intention of giving up when she counseled her friends to stop fighting the Devil’s Snare. Acceptance is a pause, a breath. It is a gift of a moment to reassess and decide where you want  to direct your efforts, a moment that is inaccessible to us if we are actively engaged in a struggle.

Practicing acceptance, practicing recognizing the Devils Snares in your life, can be a powerful step in finding your way.